Welcome to Mama Chicken Pate's domain. From here on down, everything is pure, unadulterated Pate. Here one will find the Pate, the whole Pate, and nothing but the Pate.
I've known Pate for about five months now. One day in April or so I found a lovely little message in my email box and ever since we've been corresponding. Every day brings a new message, although I never know what to expect, and if I if I am silly enough to expect, she dashes it with something entirely different. Pate is an enigma. Yet she's also just your average, ordinary, collegiate, biker chic, motherly, sillyhead, new englander, jelly beany, mama chicken type. Pate defies explanation. She is a sybil. The poetic words that flow from her hand are her prophetic and wise children.
Here I've compiled some of Pate's favorite links and some of her choicest lines. I hope you'll enjoy them...
I paused for a moment, considered the possibility, and said, "Well, if that's so, at least I'm emailing a demented, big, fat old lady with imagination
I looked at the paper, looked at the guy and said, really nastily, "you're giving me your TRASH?!" He said it wasn't trash and, silly me, whehn I opened it up, it was his phone number.
I am queen of simple tasks. I am queen. green genie. glad to hear you're beating the illness. the cough ---- you don't smoke, do you?...or hang with smokers...cause that could be the source of your problems. (Mother internetally advice.) Yo mama chicken PATE almost forgot....what Eyre are you reading? I went through a jane phase...
My friends and I went to some story telling and it sucked. Let me tell you, word choice, intonation, presence, and knowledge a story teller make. this chick, she had NONE OF THESE! Her stories were full of "way back when's" and "stuff" and "whatever." fine for informality, but geeze.
AAAARGH! pate did not have a good afternoon this afternoon. AAAAARGH!
i don't know what y our place is like, though...but it doesn't sound like it would cater to a whimsical young lad (i just felt like using the phrase....) uh oh...are you a spoiled brat?!?!?!?!!!!!
you were born in Bisbee? BISBEE? what a fun name! BISBEE BISBEE BISBEE. hee. i love jelly beans, smelly jelly welly beans, jelly belly jelly beans, telly belly welly beans, jelly bellies in my belly belly belly beans...I LOVE JELLY BEANS! (did i ever tell you about how CEREBRAL I am?????!!!!!!??) Your silly pal, Pate p.s. -- subject relevance schmubject schmelevance
i wrote you a poem: fried chickens fried chickens smatter 'em batter 'em put 'em on a platter, Uuummm!
anyway, this cat of mine is killer. i woke up in the middle of htie night once, half aware that someting was mildly wrong.
I hope you think i am a biker chic, a motorcyle mama with saddlebags -- the ol' thunder thigh, but it makes me look tough, makes me look mean? You think i've gotten into a couple bar fights? You think i ride a hog, the ol' harley?
And what's this, "Just sign the freakin' guest book" stuff? Since when have you been the be-all end all COLLECTOR OF NAMES?
...and miss shugrue went in the hallway , called the other teachers on that floor and convinced them we were being poisoned. in a few minutes, all of B- building was evacuated into A Building cafeteria....all because a few stupid kids didn't want to sit through latin......crazy
The History of Jelly Beans
Jelly Bean Tasting
Margaret Atwood Links
That's it for now. Check back later for more links and lines. You can send pate email by clicking the little mailbox below.